Growing up, I was a tomboy. In the neighborhood, we played kickball, football, basketball and baseball a-lot. Every game, we picked new teams. I can’t remember ever being a first, second or third pick… Now it’s a vague memory. Back then it mattered. It said something to me.
Somewhere in my teens, I first experienced girl cliques. One week you’re ‘in’ but any day you could be ‘out’, depending on who you wanted to be ‘with’. Suffice it to say, I’m glad I was a tomboy for so long!
When we’re kids – and grown ups – the culture presents lots of scenarios to experience chosen or not chosen.
chosen: picked. elected. a favorite. popular.
or
chosen: God’s beloved.
Which one defines your perspective?
Which do we want to define our child’s?
“For you are a people holy to the LORD your God. The LORD your God has chosen you to be a people for his treasured possession, out of all the peoples who are on the face of the earth… it is because the LORD loves you…” (Deuteronomy 7.6, 8a)
We know what the right answer is. It’s getting there that can be so hard.
When I focus my mind and heart toward God, I feel His strength. When I experience his love through His Word, worship, relationships and other blessings I’m encouraged. His evidences remind me that I’m one of His CHOSEN.
But those other days. Well, they’re hard. I don’t see them coming because they usually evolve through a slow-building pile of circumstances. I experience a hurt. I don’t handle something well, so I’m disappointed in myself. I have a lonely day. I see someone else’s value and conclude I come up short. I mess up again, and then again.
My focus shifts from Whose.I.am to who I am not.
Hurt, disappointment and comparison turn our head. We withdraw or compete – or maybe a little of both. And it’s exhausting.
We lose our bearings. Our view shrinks to our surroundings and how we see ourself in it.
Our children do this, too.
The primary opportunity our children have to experience being chosen is in our home—to know we love them deeply and steadfastly, just because.
“For we know, brothers loved by God, that he has chosen you…” (1 Thessalonians 1.4a)
Loving our children emboldens them to believe what we see in them is what God gives us to see in them.
Ultimately, God’s love encourages us (and our children) to see what He sees in us.
Dear God,
I give you all my pain from not being chosen by people. Please heal me.
I give you the ways I’ve sought to be chosen by people.
Thank you for choosing me. Help me believe and receive how you love and see me.
Help me be Your powerful vessel of love to my children so they can begin to glimpse the amazing love You have for them.
Help them know they are chosen by You. Loved.
Amen.
Amy Bruton Strong says
Thanks Teresa! What I am reminded of are the many times that I have felt “not included”. But, quickly, my heart is convicted of times that I have done that to others. Lord help me!! I am sharing this with our children because it is important that they realize that they are chosen by the ONE who matters most!
Love you lots!
Amy
Teresa says
Hi Amy,
I agree! So blessed to hear from you. Love you, too.
Meg says
Hi Teresa (I want to say “Tag” 🙂 ,
After all these years ,and time apart, you always know the right things to say! As if you KNOW still, what I need to hear!
I know your words speak to many , but thank you for speaking to “me”!
Love and miss you!
Meg
Teresa says
Meg!
I miss you! Thanks for your encouraging words.
We have to catch up SOON.
Love you,
Teresa